everybody changes.....

2008-07-20T00:27:00.002+08:00

today is an interesting day all thanks to one umbrella tt my young sis bought.....

mi n her went to bugis...other den her buying present for her bf....we oso went to c 林宥嘉 and 刘力扬签唱会 wha....their singing realli 实力派...live sing veri good sia....even tho 宥嘉 nt feeling well but he sings dam well....nw comes the umbrella...

while waiting it starts to drizzle....so i told her to buy the umbrella...@ 1st tot for nth....den when 刘力扬 sing finish 1st song....starts to rain....lol....so its @ least a use....overall the mini concert is nice...realli enjoy their songs....

den we went ermm....bugis village den went marina sq....while shopping heard fireworks....wanted to go out n c....den realised its raining....tts when the umbrella came in handy....we can use the umbrella to get closer to a view of the fireworks....wha dam nice...lol....den we went back to bugis village to buy the present for my young sis bf....den went to eat 剉冰 b4 goin home....

overall quite an interesting day for mi....waiting for nxt wk when my frens come out of the 2 wks confinement....

2008-07-11T16:23:00.002+08:00

went to the dentist jus nw....haven been there since like wat....end of my sec sch life? kinda afraid initially but alrite aft tt.....turns out tt the prob wif my teeth is the gums nt the teeth itself....so they do some softening n bleed out my gums.....n explained the reason.....n i nd to do flossing....which i tot i did ok but oh well.....

sumhw felt veri lonely in a way....most of my frens hav all entered the army....haiz....kinda felt isolated cos they will eventually ORD earlier den mi.....so in a way i'll b last.....haiz.....last in everything....kinda gt use to it....given my history.....

2008-07-06T00:04:00.002+08:00

ooohh....so tired nw....spend whole day on arens bday....morning went eat breakfast den mi arens joan n kokseng went to sentosa.....mi 1st time in 2+ yrs.....1st time a lotta things....the rail....the beach....lol....jus a lotta things....den went to the beach to play frisbee....beach volleyball....n jus relaxed.....quite fun acty 4 mi....den later met up wif zm wy n tw....went to eat carl's jr den went gloria's jean coffee to chill.....b4 gg home....

another few more days a lotta my frens will b goin in 4 BMT liao...haiz....kp talkin bout army stuff....made mi tot a lotta things.....tis morning too....thruout the whole slp had nitemare...bout wat else....lol....every time tell myself nt to tink....but the switch is on....jus like tt...a split sec of tot....of words....of speech....haiz.....

my days r numbered.....tts hw i feel @ least....

2008-06-21T22:08:00.003+08:00

haven been updating 4 a while.....well today is my 20th bday.....went out wif my classmates n oso to welcome zm aft e 2 wks confinement in BMT.....we went to watch 'Get Smart'....haha funny movie....aft tt went to shop ard n we had dinner @ pastamania.....haiyo...they bought a cake 4 mi....quite surprised.....thnx 4 the cake.....

n oso thnx to my frens who rmb my bday....realli enjoyed my day...

oh btw.....i bought 翻滚吧蛋炒饭电视原声带....haha its nice....listening to its songs nw....

2008-05-27T21:11:00.002+08:00

wooot.....so i had finally graduated.....3 yrs go by......jus like tt.....the grad ceremony itself was ok....but the photo taking sessions later were great......will upload some pics when i received it....

our course oso received a graduating book to reminisce of our times during the 3 yrs.....it sure was interesting....

had a lotta tots running thru my mind seeing those ppl i met during these 3 yrs....a lotta gd memories happen during these 3 yrs n i realli appreciate the time we had....

met tis fren onli 4 a few mths.....but nw i c a better light of respect n honor 4 him.....aft hearing.....reading....n knowing him in person.....his story realli inspires ppl....

jus a few sec ago saw the news bout our sch grad ceremony.....haha lucky didnt hav mi taken sia lol....didnt even know those camera inside the convention centre is 4 the media....lol.... but overall enjoyed myself during the grad ceremony.....nw nd to rest my leg.....dam freakin strained....n exhausted....lol.....

2008-05-24T00:48:00.001+08:00

found tis interesting entry frm my fren blog....cos it realli reflected my current situation tt im in nw....in a way acty nt directly.....

Breaking free from overthinking:

1. Understand that overthinking is not your friend

Overthinking does not makes you see life more clearly, instead it gives u a tunnel vision that only focus at the wrongs in your life. It drains your motivation to do anything positive and cripples your thinking about solutions to the problems. At a point of time, you sense that gaining new important insights can make breaking free from overthinking very difficult. It seems wrong to put down the compelling issues cause they're not solved and make you feel bad. You feel deeply justified in your anger and sadness-you deserve to be furious and have the right to feel depressed! you do have the right, but overthinking only fans them into a huge fire that gets out of control. You may sink into a depression that you can't pull out of. You may lash out in anger in ways u'll later regret.Recognise that overthinking is not your friend! It is not giving you deep insights but stealing away your thoughts and feelings. It is seducing you to think and do thinks that are not of your favour. If you find that you're struggling inside yourself with overthinking, try something corny by saying
"Overthinking, you are not my friend! You are hurting me! Go away!"

2. Give It a Rest

Give your brain a rest by engaging in pleasant distractions! Do things that you like, that will make you happy, make you feel contented. A jog, shopping, have ice-creams, have chocolates, do volunteering, engage in grp activities, bake.. whatever or whichever that give your brain a rest. But do not indulge yourself in alcohol or anything that's against your conscience.

3. Get up and get moving

Get your butt off the chair and move around! Engage in physical activity as a distraction. Dont fall into trap that you will gain great insights into your problems by thinking them through the night. The thinking in the middle of the night rarely holds any special benefits, and often fraught with anxiety and fear. Moreover, if you think alot at night, you'll be tired the next day hindering yout ability to think straight. Get out of bed, read something pleasant or take a walk when overthinking at night. Change the outlook of the place (home/office) if it triggers overthinking. Move around! Take a walk, go for exercise!

4. Join the thought Police

Sometimes we are in a situation in which it is difficult to find a distraction from our overthinking or get up to move around.You can try telling yourself firmly to stop overthinking for the moment and how do we do so? Just yell silently "STOP!" to yourself or you can buy this mini toy "STOP" sign to put at home,in your office or carry it around. Everyone has the ability to create her own inner "STOP" sign and thereby call a halt to negative spiraling. Maybe saying a stop wont work for you, try some other words like "No!" or "Dont go there!" or "Done!". This will stop your overthinking for a short time but hopefully long enough to allow you to intervene with yourself to other ways that you will have longer-term effect.

still slightly depressed atm....haven realli recovered frm it....but im guessing tis post will help mi a bit in a way....thnx a lot.....

2008-05-20T01:21:00.002+08:00

cant slp tonight....something jus happened.....havin restless nights 4 the past few days...dun will b able to tonight....so might as well blogged bout it....if u r reading tis post....im nt blamin u.....its nt ur fault anyway....mayb its jus my mind...

been veri depressed @ myself aft the conversation....esp the last msg....cos i didnt know hw to react initially...my heart came to accept tt....but somehw my mind cant....its jus tt i didnt expect tt last tuesday was the last time i wld saw u.....aft tt i hav to wait 4 a mth....tt day kp detesting myself tinking tt its my fault to c u bein down....i onli felt better aft ur clarification wif mi the day aft....

nw my whole feeling of typing tis entry is so....moody....jus tinking bout the fact tt it will onli b a mth later when i can c u kills mi....within tis period of time i realli duno wat to do.....slacking......but realli doin absolutely blank......job....but still havin tt fear....tt fear in which i cant explain....mayb tts the reason y i screwed the job interview.....there is tis fear inside mi tellin mi all bout my insecurities.....n it showed during the interview....

haiz...my mind is in a blurred state nw....1 mth is realli depressing.....n jus when i was lookin 4ward to sat.....den tt sentence....feel so wrecked nw....shall nt mention the details here....had tt conversation aft....but its tt last sentence tt killed mi.....

im hoping i wont hav another sleepless nights.....but im guessing tis nite wld b another 1.....

tired....mentally...n emotionally.....

2008-05-11T21:48:00.003+08:00

yest had a great time....went to settler's cafe......mus say its much better den mind's....in the fact they know wat games to b selected 4 us.....jus too bad tt wanwei n kevin isnt working on tt day....im sure they can recommend some gd games 4 mi n my frens =P but overall is fun....veri high @ the end....den went walking ard clarke quay area b4 gg to city hall....den decided to had rochor beancurd @ selegie....i mus say the geylang 1 is better...lol...

realli enjoyed the company of ppl yest....realli had fun wif u guys....we shld hang out more often....PIZZA PARTY!!!! izzle *hic*

2008-05-09T00:52:00.002+08:00

they say there's always a 1st 4 everything....well im guessing tonight wld b a lot of 1st.....realli opened up my heart to u jus nw....make mi say things which i dun to others....realli had a great time gg out wif u today....realli enjoyed myself 4 the 1st time.....realli hope...to c u soon.....=)

2008-05-04T01:59:00.002+08:00

oh well....i did received my letter on the morning of my last post.....n u no wat? its in....SEPTEMBER!!! im like....wtf.....i hav to wait 4 4 freakin mths jus to b posted to the army?

a lotta things ran thru my mind aft i received it....kp tinking bout the past.....bout tt moment in time during sec sch npcc.....but mostly tinking bout hw i managed to do napfa twice n failed both times while all my others frens jus pass wif onli one shot.....i kp tinking....the effort i put in wif them is the same.....but hw come the results tt came out is totally different? i oso had another tot....most....can sae almost all of my cls mates all went in the july batch.....yet im stuck here havin to b mocked @......being inside the 4 + 9 wks BMT....havin to ORD much later den them.....i kinda tot to myself....hw life hav been so unfair to mi.....everything jus doesnt seem to work out 4 mi.....everything......cos of my failure in napfa....i nd to go thru 4 freakin wks of PTP...im pes A summore....surely will get tortured more....freakin hell lor......nw jus havin the tot of bein stuck 4 4 mths n havin to find a job instead of goin in quickly to finish tt 2 yrs is killin mi....jus havin tt tot made mi realised i shldnt even go out today.....to b mocked @....to exhaust myself....cos i hav been goin out everyday since tuesday....so nw im realli exhausted....

sum1 did tell mi one thing.....tt is to b happy in life....n b optimistic bout it.....but aft i received tt letter....it jus seems like an execution tt is bein delayed....argh....

havin been eating well or talking much to the ppl ard mi....mayb cos im driftin to these stupid tots....kp tellin myself to snap out of it.....but jus cant seem to....where hav all the enthusiasm of mi wantin to go army go? is it cos i gt the undesired pes A? or cos i failed my napfa nt once....but twice....n cos mi 3 mths penalty? or cos i gt posted in sept....havin to wait a long time b4 i go in....n a long time b4 i ORD? i dunno....mind is in a whirl nw....

i know u r tryin to let mi c the brighter side of things.....by all those things u told mi....n im tryin very hard nt to tink of it.....but jus sumhw....my frens....sometimes myself....will jus triggered it.....n cos mi to go into tis.....depressing....state...i can realli feel ur effort to try to snap mi out of tis....n i''ll try nt to tink of it so often....n c things in a more positive manner....thanks for everything....realli appreciate it =)

2008-05-01T00:29:00.002+08:00

its been a while since i last blogged.....many things hav happen these past i dunno wat time....ppl receiving enlistment letter....which i haven....meeting up wif frens....slacking.....watching 星光大道....a lotta stuffs....shall talk bout yest n today.....

yest went out wif the same bunch of ppl as today.....mi yanlong shihui baoyun yucheng n jianwei who joined us today 4 the movie....b4 tt...yest was B n J's free cone day.....tt means free ice cream.....wheeee....went to united sq....queue was alreadi formin.....but we did managed to get b4 more ppl came.....den we shopped ard n had our lunch b4 we head down to bugis....n walked to city hall b4 shihui had to leave for tuition n baoyun to meet his fren.....so i left too...4 home....=D

today was out the whole day.....met @ tampines to buy the tixs 4 the 8.30pm 'iron man' movie....den went to ikea courts n giant to walk to kill time.....den we accompany shihui to bedok reservoir where she had her tuition n the others chit chatted.....aft tt went back to tampines to catch 'iron man'....kinda nice....its the kind of thing u expect frm a blockbuster movie....tho the script is kinda repeat in a way....but the gadgets sure r cool....aft tt went to hav pastamania for 'dinner' b4 we went home.....mi kinda nd to pass by geylang on my way home....bz in way....traffic congested....a lotta ppl.....prob cos as im typin....its labour day today....shivers....

had a chat wif u jus nw....had a lotta things gg thru my mind in the aftnn but i onli had to courage to say it jus nw....it was a lotta 1st times for mi....aft tt conversation.....u made mi realised the mistakes i made in the past.....but in a way kinda made mi felt relieved....sumhw aft tt a heavy boulder in my heart jus sank.....the pressure is realli off of mi...the kinda feelin i nv felt b4......but nw kp tinking of the picture.....tt moment in time tt seems to stop....it is realli in a way.....heartfelted.....when i chat wif u....even tho its short.....u made mi more.....extrovert by sharin those conversations....some of which i dun even know i had till u triggered it.....for tt....n 4 all those time.....i realli wanna thank u....its been realli great knowing u n im hopin to chat or cya soon....

2008-03-17T23:46:00.002+08:00

dam it......y i cant jus seem to pass my napfa? everytime fail @ my 2.4.....realli jus wanna giv up....nt b4 im desperate to the pt tt i even tried to ask my frens to help mi take my napfa....cos i cant see beyond the fact tt i nd to serve extra 3 mths jus cos i failed my 2.4 by a mere 8 SECONDS.....8 freakin seconds....n it cost mi 3 mths....i mean....tis is like so unfair.....den jus nw....was bein blamed 4 something which i tot wasnt my fault....isnt tryin to help sum1 a gd thing? yet i was bein blamed by others when it went wrong....sometimes i feel tt fate is playin a fool on mi.... yest supposed to go to sentosa.....but it rained.....but sat n today?there was so much sunshine.....im like wat the....

nw im wondering y i blog 4.....when there isnt any1 to look @ it.....all i wan is jus a listening ear.....jus sum1 who can hear wat i hav to say.....but all im feelin nw is silent scream....no wan can hear wat im sayin.....no 1.....

NVM '08

2008-03-02T13:28:00.004+08:00

jus came back frm the National Vertical Marathon '08.....it was nice....we ran 60 storeys up the republic plaza......1st 20 ok ok....aft tt....wha lao...every step is so agonising....stopped a lotta times beyond the 20th mark....but in the end i managed to finish the 60 storeys under 15 mins...the feelin @ the top is nice.....jus too bad cos of security reason....cant really c the rooftop...or any view of s'pore....onli offices....tts the disappointing part....den went to take a photo wif mi n arens....den went to participate in some mini event....den arens spun the wheel n hit the jackpot....where he had a chance to win an olympus camera....but lost in the end....lol....aft tt home sweet home....

my 1st outdoor competition......1st acheivement...many more to go......

aShAmeD...

2008-02-29T00:45:00.004+08:00

jus came back frm dinner frm my cls mates.....felt kinda ashamed....shall explain more in details later....

went to meet up wif chin liat they all....cos dun feel like watchin movie....esp when i hear they r watchin 'meet the spartans'....like...ewwww...anyways we went sing post to hav lunch....den saw wartini...aft tt went to grandlink to play cs n pool....n my oh my....the pool facility is so run down....the table was rigged....den went to chin liat's house to play game....while waitin for wilfred to drive us to heeren....

went to sakae to hav dinner....its lester's last day of job there b4.....i duno....closed down or reno....watever....anyways....den they started the expected conversation of 'hw is ur results?' thing....den when i here all of their sem n overall GPA.....im like so sianz n ashamed....all of them gt above 3.5 n above....den i gt.....well lets jus sae its low....den tis whole course i dun even hav a distinction or the merit cert.....but they all did...so im like the whole time tryin nt to listen to them...but cant help to....who call we sit so close to each other....

den aft tt went to pool n CS....den went home...

haiz....im proud of the fact tt im in a smart class....but disappointed @ myself 4 bein @ the lower end of the spectrum....n knowin tt i did my best makes it n even harder pill to swallow...hearing all their sem n overall GPA......i realli felt happy 4 them.....but my mind keep wanna compare wif them.....den make mi so ashamed....the whole time tryin to face them....but the results seem to like 'pop' on their face...tt shunned mi off....haiz...

kinda missed alreadi....wish u can b there soon.....

2008-01-31T00:39:00.000+08:00

FINALLY ALL OVER!!!!! end of poly life wif my last paper today (technically yest....lol....) den nw @ my fren's house to celebrate....later gg to hav a PARRRRRRRR...TYYYY!!! lol.....realli talked a lot bout our past years in poly life.....3 years jus gone in a poof......n nw......slacking....n playing games.....drinking....n....ermmm....jus slack....haha.....

tinking back of this past 3 years.....i mus sae it is realli fun n interesting in a way.....i can say its much better den sec sch life....which is so mundane.....n some bad experiences.....tho i had my share of weals n woes in poly.....but overall....i enjoyed myself thoroughly.....will definitely miss the times i had.....

i realli glad tt i made the decision to go into a poly....SP somemore.....met a lot of different frens....even the lecturers r oso veri approachable (some....) n basically....i had fun.....if there is a chance to go back in time to relive the experience.....i will definitely live it thru again =D

off to my games now..... HOLIDAYS!!!!!.....i mean.....LONGGGG HOLIDAYS!!!!

2008-01-28T13:25:00.000+08:00

haiz.....todays paper is bad bad bad.....half of the paper mark jus poof in front of my eyes.....tho i know im nt the onli 1 struggling wif the paper....im jus nt happy bout the fact tt i lost tt mark cos i dunno hw to do.....n somemore is half the paper's mark......realli wanted to study the last paper....plant safety.....but rite now i cant even tink....dun wan to either...hopefully i can recover by tml.....

off i go nw....realli dun wanna tink anything rite nw....

2008-01-01T01:10:00.000+08:00

oh well....1st post of 2008.....supposed to b exciting.....but sum thing tt happen tis evening changed everything....been awoken by a noise frm my slp.....saw wat happen.....laying on the floor.....screechin.....n cryin....i oso dunno wat to do.....den came the bickering n quarreling.....@ a lost @ tt time....fortunately my sis came in time to resolve the issue....if nt i oso dunno hw it will turn out.....she told mi.....had it nt been mi.....had i nt appear......she wld hav committed suicide....the moment i hear tt.....i dunno.....i felt veri traumatised by the whole event....>@ the same time....felt confused...shld felt relieved tt i nv go out today.....but oso felt tt if i went out tis might nt hav happen @ all.....i've been tinking.....they r fighting over the smallest matters 4 the past few wks.....haiz.....n i cant do anything bout it....nw facing them n talking to them is so hard to without tinking of wat happen....sure they resolved the prob....but i still feel the impact of it.....haiz....wish i can wash tis whole incident down the drain n 4get bout it....but i guess i cant.....nt anytime soon.....

2007-12-22T09:30:00.000+08:00

jus came back frm chalet.....4 those who wan the pics.....so srry tt i uploaded so late.....dam tired these days.....i hav uploaded it in my frenster.....feel free to take it as u like....but 4 video.....the billybanja 1.....plz approach mi on msn 4 it.....thnx....

chalet was alrite.....but kinda expected.....tt a lotta ppl left early or nv come @ all.....guess its all words no actions aye....haiz.....

haven been realli slping well these days....AD n D tt day....slpt @ 0630.....1st nite @ chalet.....slp b4 0630......last day of chalet.....woke up @ 0630.....lol.....veri irregular timing...

gonna get some gd rest today.....might hav to go out again later...zzz.....dam bz week.....but its all worth it 4 a holiday.....1 more wk...n its christmas week.....it will b special....i sumhw know it....

ciao....

2007-12-20T06:25:00.000+08:00

jus came back frm my whole day of annual dinner n dance....it was fun.....realli enjoyed myself.....

day didnt start realli well tho....bought contact lenses 4 today.....call my fren help mi fit.....he accidentally tore the left 1....so i seeing blur on left....n slightly clear on rite 4 the whole day...zzz....but anyways......took a lot of photos.....shall upload when i hav the time......today till sat still gt chalet zzz.....

back to ADnD....had a lotta interactive games......jus like the ones i hav attended 4 the past 2 times....oh ya....n wanwei won the best dress award.....haha....nt surprised....lol....

aft the ADnD....my CLS did a billybanja.....in formal wear.....haha sounded dam funny....but it was fun......

aft tt....mi n a few of my classmates went to 'The Arena'.....some club in Clarke Quay.....the place is nice....the music n the party mood....haha.....but veri loud.....n veri glaring....the flashing lights + my half visible eye = wah lao.....haha......come out of the club wif no voice.....hearing oso gt prob....haha.....tt is ard 4.....which we started @ 12+.......den we waited 4 the train to come....which nv did.....den mi n chin liat took the bus home.....rched home ard 6+....

had a great fun today.....but nt sure if i can survive another day.....as im typing nw....the sky has turned blue.....zzzz......gt to go get some rest liao....shall try to upload the pics as soon as i get back frm chalet.....ciao....

2007-12-05T18:31:00.000+08:00

woot!!!! no more FYP!!!! jus finished my presentation jus nw.....everything turn out to b A OK....gt gd comments frm the lecturers.....once we dismissed....jus felt so relieved....

i rmb the time when we gt the project frm our 2nd ballot.....kinda disappointed @ 1st....cos we nv gt our project we wan.....but along the whole project, i realised the real challenge in it.....bout hw to troubleshoot....hw to work under pressure.....as our main constraint is time.....but overall its a great experience.....these past 9 mths hav been challenging.....but exciting as well....wanna thank every1 who helped mi along the way.....our supervisor....Mrs Tham....the contractor...Mr Joseph Loh....our TSO...Mr Ken Sooon.....lecturers tt help us along the way.....Ms Claire Ng....Mr Kon...Mrs Choo....n students who helped us by givin us comments on the plant....n last of all....my partner....Arens....thnx a million =D

off to my games nw....tata...

2007-11-22T23:17:00.000+08:00

had napfa today.....haiz.....failed 4 silver by 8 secs.....8 FREAKING secs......jus hoping they will b lenient....but hmmm.....im proud of myself alreadi.....bein able to get tt timing.....but @ a price.....the moment i finished n sit down.....my whole legs felt like its paralysed....cant move @ all....i onli like....bein able to move aft like 10+ mins...den when i get up.....veri hard to move...nw my legs still hurt quite a bit.....

overall....im nt disappointed @ myself....im acty proud of it.....being able to do wat i previously cant.....

::sighs:: dam tired....tml will b gg to sch to do the final touch up for FYP.....presentation on 5th dec....mus jiayou 4 tt =D

2007-11-01T09:39:00.000+08:00

jus posted a video titled 'The Night Sky' by Keane.....its a song bout warchild......i tink is dam awesome.....y nt u check it out urself =)

THE NIGHT SKY by KEANE

ONE DAY I WILL BE
BACK IN OUR OLD STREET
SAFE FROM THE NOISE THAT'S
FALLING AROUND ME
AND WE'LL RELEASE THIS TOWN FROM THE PEOPLE
WHO ARE TRYING TO KNOCK IT DOWN
AND THEN ONLY CITY LIGHTS WILL BRIGHTEN THE NIGHT SKY
AND THERE WILL BE NO SOUND

OPEN THE BARS AND
OPEN THE MARKETS
OPEN THE BANKS AND
OPEN THE CHURCHES
AND WE'LL RELEASE THIS TOWN FROM THE PEOPLE
WHO ARE TRYING TO KNOCK IT DOWN
AND THEN ONLY CITY LIGHTS WILL BRIGHTEN THE NIGHT SKY
AND THERE WILL BE NO SOUND

WE'VE BEEN COWERING SO LONG
OH WHAT I WOULD GIVE
I AM SO LITTLE AND OH WHAT I WILL GIVE
TO STAND AT THE BUS STOP
OR BROWSE IN A BOOKSHOP
TO SLEEP AND ALWAYS BE STILL

AND WE'LL RELEASE THIS TOWN FROM THE PEOPLE
WHO ARE TRYING TO KNOCK IT DOWN
AND THEN ONLY CITY LIGHTS WILL BRIGHTEN THE NIGHT SKY
AND I WILL BE SET FREE FROM THE PEOPLE
WHO ARE TRYING TO BURY ME
AND THEN ONLY FIREWORKS WILL LIGHT THE SKY AT NIGHT
FOR ALL THE WORLD CAN SEE

2007-10-27T17:09:00.000+08:00

wooooot......felt so happy today.......started raiding @ 9.....finish @ 4....but managed to complete kara!!!!! haha....the feeling was GREAT!!!!.....for those of u who dun get wat i mean by all these....play WoW.....lol....

e-learning started.....but heck.....gonna enjoy myself for the wk.....for it will b hell in the wkdays ahead....haha....

ur words r so inspiring.....realli help mi look 4ward to everyday.....thnx a lot =D

2007-10-18T22:11:00.000+08:00

went to eat geylang claypot rice today....i mus sae its dam nice.....realli enjoyed the food......den went to supermarket to do research.....

haiz....time past so fast....its alreadi the 4th wk.....dam tired....

if tt is the case it shld b.....i guess i hav to move on.....if tts the case.....shld i declare it myself? haiz......

2007-10-09T17:39:00.000+08:00

dam tt son of a ..... he lied to mi....grrrr....hate ppl who lie.....makes mi feel stupid n inferior.....speaking of which.....i realised the difference btw whether u get a cert or nt is jus a difference in decimals for ur GPA.....dam it.....feel so inferior wif them ard.....all seems to b able to acheive something n i gt nth.....dun realli tt motivated to study hard anymore sumhw.....frens kp tellin mi im still in holiday mood....guess i still am....n wish i am forever.....realli dun hav the drive in mi...cos no matter hw hard i try....i jus cant seem to reach tt goal.....

haiz....nw im realli @ a lost....dunno wat to say or hw to face them tml.....

2007-10-07T00:23:00.000+08:00

jus came back frm my outing wif meilian junxiu n kenneth....my pri sch frens....went ice skating today....it was fun....proud to sae i didnt fall....haha.....::hides::.....den went jurong point n eat....n drink.....n shop....n chit chat.....den went home....

realli enjoyed myself when im wif my pri sch frens.....realli had a lot to talked bout....wish i can hav more of tis outing....

gtg slp liao....dam tired.....shldnt drink coffee jus nw.....make mi wanna slp more.....zzzz.......

2007-10-01T00:09:00.000+08:00

grrr.....nw still so tired aft like slping the whole aftnn.....came back frm IC camp tis morning....it was alrite la the camp.....jus realli nt use to seeing fewer campers.....but yest 4 mi is horrid.....cant even slp @ all....had short bursts of slp.....1 hr onli like slp 10-20 mins....den @ 5 in morn i totally cant slp @ all....dam.....but i guess overall it was alrite 4 mi....

heard frm my fren tt 1 of my fren's dad passed away....haiz....life is jus so unpredictable.....learnt to cherish more of the ppl ard mi.....nv hold 4 tml....get things done by today....

gtg....still gt prac tml....sianz....tot i could hav a break 4 a moment....

2007-09-16T23:47:00.000+08:00

wooot......i had a great time today......met up wif MBS 6F yr 2000 ppl....i rmb when i came in to harbourfront mrt stn.....dun even know who to look out 4.....1st person i saw is kenneth.....den slowly get to c all of those tt turned up.....@ 1st its like jus a weird chat.....havin dead silence veri often....since we haven seen each other for 7 yrs!!! den slowly....@ marche.....we started chitchatting......it was fun recalling all the fun times we had.....den we went to mind cafe to play some games.....n....hav photography session.....will upload the pics once i had it.....

to all those tt turned up....i realli enjoyed myself today.....it is the 1st time i truly enjoyed myself when im out....recalling back wat we had gone thru n wat we r nw.....it was realli great.....ty guys....n hope to c u all soon......=D

2007-09-12T23:40:00.000+08:00

gt my results back....well i guess its kinda expected.....so im neither excited or disappointed....but i lost the freaking bet to arens....nw nd to treat him a meal....haiz...

IS1005
ITP FOR DIPLOMA IN CHEMICAL ENGINEERING STUDENTS B+

CP4036
QUALITY ASSURANCE & STATISTICS A

ET003S
BUILD YOUR OWN PERSONAL COMPUTER (DIY PC) A

CP5025
PLANT DESIGN PROJECT B

CP5041
BIOPROCESS ENGINEERING PRINCIPLES C

CP5017
MASS TRANSFER IN UNIT OPERATIONS B C+

LC0214
COMMUNICATION SKILLS FOR WORK C+

CP4105
SPECIALTY CHEMICALS & BIODEVICES C+

Semester GPA:
3.031
Cumulative GPA:
3.035

had earthquake tremor jus nw.....dam....the whole room felt like its shaking.....the wind chime is ringing even tho the window is shut....n u felt very very dizzy....whole body movin bout tho u r sitting down....n it felt like 4ever....5 mins even tho....

gee....nw still a bit shaken by it...guess im off to bed....recover 4 a new day...=D

2007-09-09T00:57:00.000+08:00

went out wif my siblings today to cele my young sis belated bday.....went to NYNY....alrite la....but i ate veri full.....den went suntec to shop ard b4 my young sis go meet her fren....my elder sis go c dance competition...den as 4 mi....walk to marina sq shop ard b4 gg home....

i was staring @ my com den duno y....suddenly tot of this song......its veri tranquil......kinda reminded mi the times when i 1st heard it like wat mayb 8 or 10 yrs ago? but it still instills in my head....nw i listen again....i feel veri relaxed.....go listen n u will no wat i mean....

Bright Eyes by Art Garfunkel

Is it a kind of dream,
Floating out on the tide,
Following the river of death downstream,
Oh, is it a dream?

There's a fog along the horizon,
A strange glow in the sky,
And nobody seems to know where you go,
And what does it mean?
Oh, is it a dream?

Bright eyes,
Burning like fire.
Bright eyes,
How can you close and fail?
How can the light that burned so brightly
Suddenly burn so pale?
Bright eyes.

Is it a kind of shadow,
Reaching into the night,
Wandering over the hills unseen,
Or is it a dream?

There's a high wind in the trees,
A cold sound in the air,
And nobody ever knows when you go,
And where do you start,
Oh, into the dark?

Bright eyes,
burning like fire.
Bright eyes,
how can you close and fail?
How can the light that burned so brightly
Suddenly burn so pale?
bright eyes.

Bright eyes,
burning like fire.
Bright eyes,
how can you close and fail?
How can the light that burned so brightly
Suddenly burn so pale?
Bright eyes.

i am still tinkin.....jus cant put the tots out....haiz....

2007-09-07T01:31:00.000+08:00

jus woke up to blog some of my tots....cant slp anyway....so....

while i was trying to slp....flashes of the past came to my mind....tinking hw sensitive n cowardly i am.....tinking 4 quite some time b4 i go to slp these few days....tinking back.....it all started in my sec sch days.....these....'frens' of mine....who i tot they were.....ripped mi off all of my confidence i had to make mi who i am today.....it was the worst period of my life....

coming into poly....tot it wld b better....nv wld i tot it wld come back n haunt mi.....oso....i hav becum more n more sensitive....even simple comments like wat im wearing or wat im doin is taken seriously into tots.....n kp ringing into my head.....my 1 tot is trying to get rid of it....but my another keeps tinking bout it.....so im still stuck in tis dilemma n cant seem to get out of it.....

another issue....a more impt 1 i lag is the confidence......simple task i cant do well due to lack of it....leadership is a veri impt thing in life....but if i dun hav confidence....hw do i move on in life? speaking up....normal start talk wif strangers.....even to frens.....all i cant do properly.....i dun even know hw to start.....

i jus realised i cooped myself into tis 'shield' tt i am....nt havin the courage to break out of it....tinking chatting online....on the phone....or emails or letters is the best way of communication rather den a straight up talk.....tinking music is the best company when frens r ard who acty r the best companion u hav besides ur family....jus dunno wat to do....

to all my frens who know mi n r readin tis post....i hope u can tolerate my sensitivity towards u guys.....some comments made i know is trivial n shld b 'disposed' in my mind....but somehw i am nt able to throw it away n take it to heart....which i dun like....but my mind somehw does so....

about my confidence....i am hoping i am given a slight chance of bein able to do wat i wanna do...tho i know its all up to myself to build up confidence....but i haven been able to do it 4 the past 5 yrs....to speak up....to hav e courage to do wat i wan to do....to do.....a lotta things tt were once hindered by my confidence....but 4 nw....i dunno wat to do to do so....i hope i am able to b who i truly b....a sanguine tt i tot i wld b.....nt a melancholic/choleric tt i am nw.....

off to my slp den....gt FYP tml....praying tt i can slp tho.....

2007-08-25T23:27:00.000+08:00

shall start tis blog frm yest....

went swimming....wha dam shiok....but when go hav lunch sit down.....den try to stand up....wha kao....hamstring pull....dam pain....cant even walk properly....go home can onli use com den less pain....

today went 4 bbq....alrite la acty....gt to relax aft the exams is a great thing....oso celebrated edmund angela n wen kai's bday......den gt entertainment tooo.....shall nt mention much....

on my way home....saw lay har....my sec sch fren....tho is she saw mi when im staring in blank air when in mrt....totally nv c her la...so paiseh....anyways.....realised she quitted sch n had a stable n successful job.....had high pay too....so dam cool.....

Goin to the bbq made mi realise hw lonely i am acty.....nv realli had 1 person tt i can comfortably talk to....tho i did try today.....n nv realli worked well.....partially....or shld i sae....mostly....cos of my lack of confidence.....all tt i wanted to sae all gone blank.....realli dun like the feeling of gg home disappointed.....tinking tt i shld do tis i shld do tt.....when i cant even do it.....felt so useless.....seeing 2 ppl together tis whole 5 sems.....n i onli hav 1 more sem left b4 NS....felt like a failure....nw alreadi havin 2nd tots of whether i wan to go IC camp or nt....dun like the feeling of bein obstracised....dun like the feeling of bein alone....haiz......they sae wats done during childhood will hav a major impact on ur life when ur older....hw true can tt b....

2007-08-23T22:41:00.000+08:00

FINALLY....EXAM OVER!!!!

so dam relieved.......tis sem sucks big time.....but haiz....still gt fyp to go....nevertheless....gt to make full use of tis long break....

gg swimming tml....been a LONG time since i do so.....but gt to exercise....nafa in nov....jia you....=D

2007-08-17T22:13:00.000+08:00

ended the 1st wk of exam jus nw....sucks man....screwed the prob n stats paper......haiz.....still gt 2 more papers.....MTB n bioprocess....dam.....nd to jia you liao.....off i go....

2007-08-05T23:40:00.000+08:00

went 4 my sis bday party today....haha....i mus sae its fun....tho i nv realli play e games....jus too bad tt i hav test later...sucks man....if nt i can stay a bit longer....caught up wif a lotta my sis frens....haha changed a lot....

to my sis....happy bday....n srry 4 bein so anti-climax....studying @ chalet....wha kao....its seriously tt bad 4 mi....but oh well....life sucks...so...

havin a veri bz wk tis wk....almost everyday packed....either studies.....or more studies....zzz....

will tis ever end?

2007-08-04T10:52:00.000+08:00

jus a random post to get out of my study mode....

i've completed the impossible quiz....haha....finally....rmb tt time when edmund intro tt time...wha...all the qn so alien....nw....heeheehee.....

back to reality...exams is looming.....hope i will b able to do well....1st time gg to an exam period wif veri little confidence....yikes....hate the feeling...

k back to my studies nw...zzz....

2007-07-27T20:26:00.000+08:00

argh....today is horrid....waited 4 4 hrs 4 the contractor den nv come....den when the engineers come....they r working on another project....waste my time lor today....gt back home immediately slp til jus nw....

still dun hav the will to study....wat the hell.....gt to change my mind concept....mus study mus study mus study!!!!!!!

heard frm my fren tt 1 of my sec sch fren has died of brain tumor....haiz....life is short.....mus make full use of it....dam....still gt a lotta dreams nt fulfilled.....hope it came true....

2007-07-20T18:49:00.000+08:00

haven been updating 4 a while....been bz doin plant design individual report....realli wanna thank rayner 4 his help...

went to watch transformers....again....but still 1 word....AWESOME!!!!....the transformation part is the coolest....

havin test every wk is horrid....but havin test all the way to the exams is sucky....dun hav enough time to do my studies....haiz....jus hav to giv it my best....

off i go nw...veri tired....zzz....

2007-07-15T18:24:00.000+08:00

changed the music to 'Map of the Problematique' by Muse.....awesome video in my perspect....esp the drum playing n the electric guitar solo on the last part....c it 4 urself....

tml is wk14....n i still feel the 'slackiness' in mi....onli study a while den wanted to break....dam it....exams r coming....nt much hope tis sem....guess cptc realli woke mi into realising tt i hav chosen the wrong course....but nevertheless....hav to giv my best in it...theres always hope aft my NS....

gt test on tue....last test 4 the module....aft tt....free frm it! plant design report dunno wat to do... haiz.... hope to complete it soon....

2007-07-11T22:35:00.000+08:00

went to watch poly50....i mus sae its an enjoyable 1....b4 tt....

went to run 2.4 wif arens...dam jialat sia my timing....18 mins!....i willl die if i get tt results 4 nafpa....well tts wat happens when u dun exercise 4 like wat.....1 1/2 yrs? haha...

den watch poly50 den became photographer....had a lotta participants....in the end....tat xiong's team gt 1st 4 the alumni category....i rmb tt moment when im beside tat xiong @ finishing line n took the pic of kaserine running towards the finish line....den when she showed the no. 1 card to tat xiong....he was ecstatic.....haha...mi 2....grats to them....the other alumni team...aaron's team...gt 6th....the 2 CLS teams gt 11th n 14th....grats too....

jus realised tt the whole race....onli mi n wanwei r the onli yr 3s ard..... =(....but i guess i do hav fun too wif the yr1s n 2s....hope tis can go on b4 i 'retire' haha....

aft race went to prata house to eat....struggled quite a bit to eat the murtabak cos its dam big....but managed in the end....

dunno y....suddenly felt so relief.....somethings tt i wanna say i gt the chance to...n i did....aft saying it....there is a....void....inside....which somehw in tis case....is a gd thing.... nv felt better....

legs darn tired....long time nv exercise den nw pain....go rest liao....nitez....

2007-07-10T01:44:00.000+08:00

1st of all....i hav no idea wat the hell im doin....nw still awake @ tis hr....when im haavin a full day tml....zzz...

anyways....live earth is....kinda a dilemmic 1....on 1 hand...i luv to support the environment....n oso enjoyed the music....stayed up on sunday morn frm 12 midnight to bout 8 in the morning 4 the london concert....it rocks.....

on the other hand...when i saw the news of hw they still leave trash lying ard....i tot to myself....hw ironic....mayb live earth did nt convey the msg aft all...

jus realised tt its nt ez to jus tell ppl to stop or reduce tis or tat....but oh well....

off i go....gettin slpy by the minute....

2007-06-24T20:12:00.000+08:00

dam it sucks to go out on a sunday....esp when the nxt day is a start of a sch term....argh....the feelin is jus horrible....knowing tt u hav to wake up early tml....n hav the feeling like u nv finish any work u hav done....

anyway....the holis is e best....time pass the longest.....wish it nv ends....

well gtg pack my bag liao.....dreaded 4 tml....

2007-06-21T23:55:00.000+08:00

bday today!!!....ermmm @ least 4 a few mins more....

woke up today....nv realli anticipated the day....dunno y.....den aftnn met SH n Kok....chit chatted the whole time...bout WoW....bout a lotta things.....

den went nbe chalet....wanted to meet arens 4 dinner...but he off work late....so went to eat on my own 1st...den he treat mi alcohol drinks....

den went back to chalet house....seniors gave mi a surprise...haha...nv expected tt....but nevertheless i enjoyed it....

to all my frens who rmbed n wished mi....thanx a lot....reallied enjoyed my day.....my wish is to all of u...to all who i know of....to live happily n healthily.....

but my ultimate wish is to b able to bring out my confidence...which i tink i seriously lag....

but to end of on a positive note.....i had a great holiday!!!

2007-06-07T23:23:00.000+08:00

had my class outing today....haha....turned out tt it isnt so bad aft all....went uma uma men....gd jap restaurant....

den went suntec city arcade play....discovered some hidden talents among us...haha...dun c them study so hard....they can play dam hard too...

den went home had drinks....mi had a vodka drink...4got the name...but the best among those chosen...haha...den aft tt went home...

officially declared today holiday!!! woohoo...time to relax....n enjoy tis 2 wks....zzzz.....

2007-06-07T00:25:00.000+08:00

went to watch pirates 3 wif arens n zm...dam nice....esp the final battle @ maelstrom... dam cool CG...

aft tt went eat subway....guess wat? im broke....again...zzz....no more $$ 4 the wk....nd to borrow again...sianz....

test is over....4 nw...can start enjoying the 2 short wks of holi....make full use of it...whahaa....

go slp liao...veri e tired....zzz....

2007-06-03T00:58:00.000+08:00

updates....wei kang call mi to la....haha...

lost my freakin thumbdrive....again!....rah.....siannz.....2nd time liao....jus cant put myself to rmb to take out frm the com....oh well...can onli blame myself 4 bein 4getful.....so went buy another 1 today @ IT fair wif arens....but he cant stand the crowd....so jus buy a thumbdrive frm the border area den left liao....lookin on the brightside of things tho....2GB cost mi $29 when last time cos mi $89 4 1GB...haha...

den met waiyew walk ard...chill out...den dinner @ uma uma or something like tt....den went home...

haiz....realli nd to boost my stupid memory liao....cant go on like tt....

2007-05-29T23:57:00.000+08:00

argh....feel so sick nw....whole body feel so weak....hope i can make it 4 qaas test tml...4 nw....go zzz....nd to recover!!!

SRRR n F n H

2007-05-21T00:25:00.000+08:00

woot....jus came back frm peter's house...dam tiring n aching nw...

morning went 4 food n heritage tour...had to drag myself frm bed to wake up...tho i nv realli slp the nite b4....anyways....mi chun long n peter named ourselves....shimmerweeds...n we started off the race like mad...reached the stn 1st...but dam nel line...hav to wait dam long....went boon keng @ 1st...wha the code dam hard to decipher....nearly dunno hw to...den went farrer park....aft tt....clue to chinatown...gee....tot i know much....acty onli knew a small bit of it...den went maxwell....den to kampong glam...den towards golden mile...n den to finish line....hyperventilating @ the end....scare mi....arrived 2nd jus b4 tat xiong's grp....jus in time to c walk on water....den waited n waited n waited...till prize presentation....gt 6th...can sense disappointment tho frm them....but to mi it was alrite....being able to finish top 10 out of bout 100+ teams is a great achievement 4 mi....

guess who won? tat xiong's grp lor...haha....den we finale....do a mass billibanja...haha dam cool....1st time i do it since my toe injury tt kept mi out 4 3 mths....

den wanted to go home...but being cheoed by erastus to join him jacob peter samantha kuanjun jiasheng n libin 4 dinner....

den went to peter's house play mahjong....fun but by tt time i was extremely exhausted....mind couldnt realli tink much.....

den aft tt went home...wha kao....muscle thigh cramp till like siao....nw can ud hw it feels liao...haha....

ok go slp liao....exhausted....doin e-learning tml....hope to finish it as soon as possible....

2007-05-08T23:21:00.000+08:00

hi...came to update on today....overall....a super tiring but fun 1.....

tuesdays....8 to 6 lessons....wha kao....been slping thruout the whole lesson....save qaas n csw (csw is cos i talkin to clsmates den awake....if nt....haha....) aft tt...went club slack.....today is jacob's bday...so they celebrated his bday below sports hall....everything went alrite until....he was forced to pick a candle holder tt is inside the cake....n some1 smack him....so he took the whole chunk of cake n ran ard 'smacking' every1 haha.....aft tt....acty intend to go eat @ fc5.....den samantha ask mi if wanna go holland v....i sae ok...anyway nv been there b4....so wanna c wats there....went wif her, jacob, triple h, 'guan jun' (dunno hw to spell his name...) n the supposed edmund...but he had to go home 4 dinner....he introduced us to tis restaurant....went in realised hw ex the foods r....but nonetheless....it was nice....tho the price issue is on everybody's mind....b4 we go....played 'zong zi mi ma'....haha i dam suay.....gt 2 of the worst ones....the last 1 i gt is nasty....thanks to h....add so much salt....the crystals cant even dissolve n almost gt stuck on my throat....wha kao...drink a lota water...cant even dissolve lor...wth....but overall....the day was fun...hoping i can hav tis kinda day.....everyday....ok....@ least once a wk..hhaha.....

gtg slp liao.....happy bday jacob once again.... =)

mY lIFe IS SCreWeD!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-04-25T18:32:00.000+08:00

SCREWED UP!!!!!! y am i so dam unlucky.....everything i do....everywhere i go....all dun turn out rite....

cancelled my trip to japan 4 FYP....screw FYP.....

1st 1 to go choose the teams....tot had it....den suddenly 1 left n another cfmed wif others....so left to find ppl....den all i choose all chosen....den....left wif 1 team i joined....

tot settled....den 1 more came in....den 2....den 1....so grp nt settled....so settled on choosing the FYP....den ballot jus nw....super screwed....onli left wif 1st choice.....since 2nd 3rd n 4th all walkover...so ballot 1st choice....nv gt it....so f up....make the 7 2nd rd balloter look like some losers....den 2nd rd gt the project....but nt aft another screwed 1st rd ballot...gt it on the 2nd choice walkover....

everytime i try to go to a grp....nv realli happened....every relationship i tried to start...nv start...everywhere i go....gt the sense tt ppl dun like me.....talk bout my life....talk hw bad it is.....WAT MORE CAN HAPPEN? i realli hate my life nw.....dun feel like gg thru anymore of my yr 3 life.....getting more n more miserable everyday.....n its nt even a full term....onli 2 wks....2 freakkin wks n all these happened.....wats wrong wif my freaking lifee?

my mum asked mi once....r u happy wif ur life? i wanted to tell her....hw can i b wif my life so screwed? can sum1 tell me.....

no appetite n no mood 4 everything nw....wish i can slp n nv wake up....

2007-04-19T09:37:00.000+08:00

haiz...nw in sch....discussin bout projects....projects....n more projects....zzz onli 4th day of sch already feelin the stress tt i tot wouldnt cum back n HAUNT mi....haha....but oh well....

FYP major screw up....haven settle the grp....jus wanna get it done n over wif...den b happy bout doin my project....

gg out tis wkend....but dunno y....feel kinda odd bout it...hope everything turns out well....

dAy ToUr

2007-04-15T00:10:00.000+08:00

had day tour today....1st grp of ppl i saw....my batch ppl....most of which came back frm their overseas itp....den went to other stns to c....ended up @ the last stn....den helped them....went back to hav bbq feast.....aft much chatting n entertainment....went home....

geee....sch starting soon...hated it....dunno y....mayb cos i feel my holiday is very short...but bah....last day today....feels kinda forever....hope it will b....

rElAxEd....

2007-04-06T23:17:00.000+08:00

jus came back frm outing wif joan zhiming arens waiyew tinwei n our trainer hong wee....haha had fun...went marche 1st....chit chat den go to secret recipe...b4 gg home...oh ya....we oso gave him a shirt....haha nice....tho nt the 1 initially wanted....

ahhh....feel more relaxed nw.....even tho we onli hav 1 wk of holi...but to mi....its more den enough time 4 mi to enjoy it...i will make full use of it.....dun realli hoping 4 sch to start anyways....

k go play WoW liao.....

CPTC n FO

2007-04-05T23:15:00.000+08:00

jus graduated frm CPTC.....its hard to believe tt 6 wks had alreadi passed since it started....felt onli like yest....time pass so fast when we hav fun.....wanted to take tis chance to thank the trainers esp hong wee.....4 teachin mi on a whole lotta things tt i can nv learn out of the classroom...n the chance of exposing to such great trainers....

den went back to FO camp 07/08....feel tt the GLs had fun wif the freshies.....realli bring back those days....but oso had fun wif sum of the freshies la....tho nt realli no them....but time will tell....

tot i can hav a long entry....but too tired nw....so wanted to cut short....gtg zzz liao....later evening meeting wif hong wee wif my grp 4 dinner....makan!

2007-03-30T17:43:00.000+08:00

wha...dam tired.....jus nw had my 5 hrs of slp.....b4 tt....came back frm night shift of CPTC....much better den startup.....hwever....do too many times fuel switchover....den furnace tripped too many times....so no proper shutdown was done today....but nevertheless.....had a lotta fun....even tho @ sum times.....

4 more days left b4 it ends...shld hav felt sad....n felt happy 4 the whole exp....but dunno y....still feel a void inside my emotions.....sumthing tt block mi frm feeling it....mayb bcos even if i do....i will feel tt i dun ud everything....always needed sum1 to guide mi or sumthin...mayb its true.....im realli nt suitable in tis line of industry....

still tryin to get back the void....i hope i will get it back on sunday.....

2007-03-22T17:36:00.000+08:00

jus came back frm CPTC.....had fire fighting today....super fun!!!! haha....learnt hw to use fire hose....zzz....always kanna splash by the water.....den soaked to the toe....but had a lotta fun....

on the bad side.....made mi SUPER tired....missed the trip to SP to c the FO ppl....but i tink i will go back on the 3rd....i hope....

ok go zzz liao....realli CMI liao....haha...

tHE tIme HAS cUm!....

2007-03-07T17:29:00.000+08:00

wooot.....mood swing.....im so over the moon nw....haha....FINALLY!!....aft 4 yrs of waiting....i finally gt an A.....n nt jus tt...i get over 3.....haha....my results....

FLUID MECHANICS A A
HEAT TRANSFER & EQUIPMENT A
ENGINEERING MATHEMATICS IIA A
EFFECTIVE JOB SEARCH SKILLS B
BASIC INSTRUMENTAL ANALYSIS B+
PROCESS INSTRUMENTATION C+
PLANT UTILITIES C+
Semester GPA:
3.5
Cumulative GPA:
3.036

haha....my best results....ever.....in life....nw i realli nd to work harder to catch up wif the others....

k....gtg....gt to go do my tutorial....will update soon....

eMotIonS gT E BetTeR oF me...

2007-03-06T17:34:00.000+08:00

*sigh*...dunno wat happen....seems like its back....i realli dunno hw to ctrl it....but it gt e better of me....

i oso dunno y i acted e way i acted.....y cant anybody understand tt wat i do is tryin to help the others? y ppl kp tinking tt wat i do is....irritatin to them? y cant they ud tt?

im so tired nw....tired of everything.....every1.....everybody...jus dunno wat to do nw....nth gets to my brain nw....

haiz....tml gt test....den go back home mus check results....if i nv get an A....or above GPA of 3....i realli dunno wat to do.....

gtg...drained of my emotions.....it is time....

2007-03-04T12:50:00.000+08:00

zzz jus woke up....wanna talk bout yest.....

met joel fatein n her 2 frens....michelle n lionel....we all go watch liverpool vs man u at chijmes....nice place...a lotta ppl....den we settle @ tis jap bar.....in front of the screen...haha....in the end....liverpool 0 manu 1...last min goal....haha....

aft tt....fatein n her frens left....mi n joel....started our walk....went nydc @ wheelock 1st....went to eat mudpie....aft tt...walk to cine...shop a while....den took taxi to clarke quay....started walking....den to muhd sultan....den sumhw back to clarke quay....den to boat quay....den to raffles place....den to esplanade....den ended up @ marina sq where we had a drink n left....by e time i reached home....about 4 bahs....

ok gtg....nd to do hw n study 4 test....sianz....

iTP @ jUroNg IsLanD....

2007-03-02T17:38:00.000+08:00

finally....ended my 1st wk of itp today.....overall it was ok....1st day den lecture lecture lecture....zzz....oh btw...our grp is together wif sum NP ppl....ok la...mayb e whole NP course of dunno wat.....den lunch @ cafeteria....but wha....e food is like....geeee.....horrid.....lucky i heard frm seniors.....dey were all rite....

den met our trainer...hong wee....tough in character....but veri gd to us....realli....haha....den lecture continue til dunno when...5... basically e same 4 e nxt 2 days....

thursday....start of practicals....which mean i hav to wake up @ 5!...dunno y can wake up oso...den 1st day of practical....wear overall...kinda ok la....but the safety glasses is so.....nvm...

today best prac yet....climbed the distillation tower....all e way to e top....dam cool....e view is ecstatic....den aft prac....lunch den lecture...until 4.... best part? leavin earlier den other grp...haha....

tis schedule will go on n on n on....until e day we had shift work.....where we either hav 8 to 8....or 8 to 8....if u no wat i mean....haha....

k...gtg liao....mum naggin mi 4 dinner.....den go SLP!!!

tHe GuiLtY wIlL SuFfeR.....

2007-02-20T02:01:00.000+08:00

'the guilty will suffer...'

gt tis sentence frm warcraft...kinda like tis sentence....

recently jus so down n drained....but visitin my grandma makes mi more painful....i rmb c-ing her a yr ago....was quite plump n fair....nw...so skinny n pale...

den went out wif my cousins....its been a while since i last saw them....so much has changed....he has a gf...n its a swt 1 too...talked a lot....realli ud much bout....sumthin in which i wish i wouldnt wan to pursue.....but sumthin tt oso the heart desires....

watch 'jus folo the law'...quite funny la....den aft tt went back home....

passed by sum1's blog....saw sumthin....was puzzled @ 1st....den started askin ard.....realised the truth.....was kinda disappointed n a little bit mad @ 1st....but....its over....wishin tt my heart will stop pursuing the matter....but jus cant seem to....

nw typin tis entry...kp tinkin bout it....hw my life has changed aft e exams....instead of bein happy....nw im stuck in tis.....pit tt i cant seem to get out of....a valley of emotions.....a deep dark brethren.....jus wanted to b alone....away frm tis world to find my haven....in which i sort to seek....happiness....

hApPy LNY!!!!!

2007-02-18T00:51:00.000+08:00

hey hey....happy lunar new year....had reunion dinner jus nw b4 gg to chinatown...it was packed....can hardly walk....came back jus in time to watch the LNY show....nw 'shou ye-ing' mayb dun slp @ all i guess....still gt gd show later @ 250....wanna watch....haha....

hoping the yr of the pig will b a gd 1 4 mi....hav a gd results......n hope to enjoy myself 4 itp...go off liao.....

i WanDer AlOne....

2007-02-15T18:57:00.000+08:00

went out today....so sianz....watched ghost rider....cool....gg out....bad...dunno y....jus feel sianz....leavin early is n excuse....jus to get out of my own situation....nw i dun even get myself...putting emotions 1st b4 anything else....ever since the exams r over....its been like tt....haiz....realli dunno wats gg on wif mi nw....

eXaM OveR FinAllY!!!

2007-02-10T01:46:00.000+08:00

long time nv blog....exam period tts y.....finalli over....had to endure 4 straight papers in 4 days....plus 2 in the 1st wk....wha....tot i can hav a gd break....but 2 wks later itp...sianz....oh well...life sucks isnt it....haiz....

anyways....aft exam....dunno y feel so frustrated myself....jus lost it....sigh....but kinda recover when we went out....they all eat jack's place...nt bad la....gt fire steak....where they pour brandy den catch fire....cool....

well gonna hav a LONG....n i mean long break....rest....most impt....go liao...z.z.....

eXam Is CumIn....

2007-01-19T16:24:00.000+08:00

geee....its a long time since i blogged....been bzpreparing wif exams....cumin in 2 wks time....haiz....aft tt 2 wks holi den itp liao....sianz.....hoping to hav more time to break.....

dam....dunno y....i felt realli bad jus nw....on 1 hand.....its comforting sum1....on the other hand....felt like i hurting sum1....realli dunno wat to tink in tt situation.....jus felt realli bad to c....nw kp tinking whether i shld tell or nt....haiz....

anyways...go slp liao....rarely had a rest....

1sT dAy oF 2007!!!

2007-01-01T02:44:00.000+08:00

hilo....1st day of 2007!!! wee.....nw @ my fren's house stayin overnite....time to reflect on '06...

2006 has been a....well....kinda wake up call yr.....tinkin of the times when i was so slack durin my yr 1....nw hav to realli work hard to even jus pass my results....haiz....gt to realise a lotta things in life tt i nv cum to tink of....hmmmm.....otherwise.....the days r ok....hav to lk 4ward dun i? to 2007....hope it will b a great yr 4 mi...

jus nw went 4 zhenye's bday party....haha....nv realli eat much but had fun....

den went to meet up wif 1st 3 mths frens....oh well....didnt realli go tt well....hmmm....lets jus say it didnt turn out wat i tot it wld b....c they went to vivo....so i tot go countdown or watch fireworks....but den....they say they wanted to go to the beach....like geee......i wearin long pants sleeve shirt...go beach? lol....

so i decided to go to esplanade countdown wif my fren....the fireworks r great.....veri nice.....den meet up wif my sec sch frens....walk ard orchard den nw @ frens house lor...

hmmm...shall end here....my another fren wanna use com....anyways....happy new yr.....=)

mERRy ChRiStMaS!!!

2006-12-25T15:34:00.000+08:00

1st of all....merry xmas to everybody!!!

2nd of all....i jus woke up so nw feeling veri groggy....went out the whole day....later still gg out cos nd to buy headpiece....broke my tradition tis yr....of nt gg to church on xmas....

lets c wat i hav last wk....

monday - went to a d n d.....

tuesday - plant visit n watch movie 'eragon'

wednesday - went out wif mum n young sis....den went to MOS...

thursday - NBE outing......bbq @ jiayi's house.....

friday - break @ home...

saturday - steamboat n xmas celebration wif sum of my clsmates...

sunday - xmas celebration wif sec sch clsmates...

phew....wat a wk....but nw still veri zzz....but hey...gtg.....ermmm....once again....wish u all out there a very merry christmas.... =)

mOs....

2006-12-21T02:00:00.000+08:00

went mos today wif baoyun yanlong n her frens....woot...fun....tho the smokers realli.....cloud the room.....but definitely will go back if i hav the $$$.....

gg to jiayi house tml 4 nbe outing....haha hope i hav fun...

aD n D 2006

2006-12-19T08:05:00.000+08:00

back frm ad n d event jus nw...haven realli had much slp...still gt plant visit later...hmmm...dunno hw to survive the day....anyways....the ad n d was fun...was a ctrl of rolling the tape..nervous...but chris n his crew gt mi thru...thanks...

finally got to sit thru the whole event....was veri entertaining....had loads of fun...tho im nt involved in the playing or eating...den thereafter slack @ rm...so sianz...seriously nth to do...jus let hours past by n when morning cums....i left...

trying to get sum slp nw...kinda difficult tho....decided nt to slp...oh well....tt will make it 2 days of nt slping..high ah...

lAst DAY!!!!

2006-12-15T22:15:00.000+08:00

FINALLY.....last day.....so relaxed nw....jus nw went out immediately aft lesson....but realised the true character of sum ppl....but nvm tt....suppose to went expo 4 the nike sales....but reached there....sae sold out....low....den went tm n century....wif waiyew tinwei ryan zhiming n arens... went to eat seoul garden...filling....den shop ard n walk pasar malam b4 gg home....

phew....nv tot i wld b so relaxed....can slp late @ ease...3 wks i hope will b more den enough 4 my deserved rest aft 12 wks....haha....off i go to play games liao....

fReE....4 nW....

2006-12-12T23:56:00.000+08:00

haven update bout the wkend....shall do it today....anyways....no sch tml....finally....aft hell loads of studies n tests n tutorials....blah blah blah....finally gettin a break....

sat...went out wif my young sis....den whole time so chiao....saw a lotta of mi n my young sis frens....went vivo 1st...den aft tt went town...bought my new shoes....den shop n went home lor....oh did i mention hw....ermmm....weird i feel when she walk wif mi....brrrrr....

sun....went out wif s26 peeps tis time....quite surprised acty...a lotta ppl came....let mi tink who..
seow hong, valencia, joel, eugene, alex yeoh, dilys, kelvin, fatein i tink tts all bah....realli bad memory if i miss outt anybody....
well....wasnt expecting the whole day of eating....n drinking....but nevertheless....fun to meet all of them....hope to c u all soon...
oh...to joel n eugene....all the best in NS....cant wait to c ur new hairstyle....haha.....

guess tts all i hav to sae bah....gonna stay up all nite i guess....but...havin test on fri....hav to study later....haha...aft tt....FREEDOM!....4 3 wks tt is....zzz.....

*oUt oF oPtIon....oUt of tImE....^

2006-12-09T01:56:00.000+08:00

haven been updating much in my blog....jus too bz to.....holis cumin....so looking forward to it aft 12 wks of study....

so tired nw....main concern still twirling in my head...i realli ran out of options liao....mus i realli stick to it? haiz....it is my future tt am talkin bout....n i guess my other alternatives r all used up....mus i realli go thru tis? i dunno....jus wish to c another hope in my desolate state....

looking 4ward to wkend tho....gg out wif my young sis today....tml......meetin my 1st 3 mths frens 4 1st time since A lvl over....sumthin to b happy over....@ least.....i try to b.....

1sT tiMe aFt 4 yRs....

2006-11-28T01:25:00.000+08:00

phew....jus came back a few hrs ago wif my outing wif janice jenna jenny jeremy n kuang yi.... been a long time since i went out wif them...nt since sec sch....haha....had fun wif them....jus taking myself out frm all the stress in sch 4 the moment....went to eat @ tis restaruant call wat.... ermmm...vila'ge...sumthing like marche....wha lao....so ex...lucky gt 20% discount...haha... den went to watch 'step up'...nice show....esp the dance moves n the songs...woot.....nice....den went take photos....den went home wif them...

gg out wif ian they all tml....haiz...dun realli looking forward to it tho...

oh...did i 4got to mention tt these 2 days i had.....had a test the day aft? wat the hell am i tinking?

aLonE nW.....

2006-11-26T16:49:00.000+08:00

hi....currently nw all alone @ home....family went to genting....while im stuck here....doin my formal report n studying 4 PU on tue....haiz...but i tink its a gd thing in a way its better 4 mi to study....well nth much to blog bout....basically my wkend is spent @ home doin my work....which was nt i tot in the 1st place...acty intended to go somewhere else....den suddenly last min cant make it....zzz.....but its ok....

gtg liao....do my work....zzz....mus nt slack....2 more wks....

toO mAny WOrK....

2006-11-20T22:52:00.000+08:00

long time nv update....nv realli had the time....in fact...im acty bz nw....jus extracting out sum time to do sum blogging...

haiz....BIA report is so sianz....formal report like a lot to write lor....i still gt other work to do...but jus dunno wat....still gt test summore...phew....sianz.....

ok la....go do work liao....back to the bz mi....wish tis cld end...

viVo....

2006-11-13T13:30:00.000+08:00

suppose to blog tis entry yest....but sis using com so no chance....so blog today....

went to vivocity 4 the 3rd time....tis time wif my young sis n mum....haha....nv get bored of tt place....so my mum n young sis started on their shopping spree...

den aft dinner....went to ben n jerry's....woot finally open....haha....mi n young sis ordered a sundae called 'merlionster' which contains 6 scoops of ice cream a banana a brownie n 3 toppings of our choice....haha....dam nice....den mi n young sis wrote our 'feedback' on the servette....haha we r nt the 1st 1 to write it....on 1 wall....hav the whole column of it....im nt surprised....their service is gd....always smiling....den veri frenly....left mi a veri gd impressions of it....the ice cream too...haha...

in the end....my young sis bought the most stuff....zzz....i bought.....none...haha....had a great time yest.....

will upload pics of it once i get it frm my toot young sis...haha....

btw....1st day aft e-learning wk....kinda alrite....hope it will b 4 the rest of days....

gEtTiNg tO No mYsElf BeTTer.....

2006-11-06T18:36:00.000+08:00

gt tis frm peiqi's blog...tink it realli reflected who i am....

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Get to know yourself better
Your view on yourself:Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on educationYou may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.

What are you most afraid of:You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

true or nt...judge it 4 urself....jus wasted my time gg back to sch jus nw...haiz....

fReNs....iS it ReaLli iT? or.....

2006-11-06T01:37:00.000+08:00

im back....suddenly hav tis tot of blogging my tots down....

tis sem realli changed mi.....its onli 4 6 wks nw....but so much has happened....

1st of all...im getting more n more.....lazy in a sense....jus cant seem to wake up @ the rite time...4 the rite moment summore....jus like wat happened last thur.... still cant seem to 4get tt event.....

2nd....tho im getting more hardworking (tt i hav to admit....cos its realli nt true if u apply to last few sems...)...but i feel tt....sum things i jus cant seem to process as fast as my clsmates....n tts y a lotta things they do i dun get....but im afraid to ask...cos im afraid to get scolded....by my peers summore....

3rd....my memory....argh....deterioriate until like dunno wat....simple things tt i suppose to rmb i oso cant....realli cost my team mates alot due to tis....

4th....clubhouse make mi realise....tt i realli am nt wat i am....i always tot....go there to c frens is a gd thing...but nw...aft a few wks of absence in club....it makes mi realise...everything changed....
the club seems to b much....... happening place without mi ard...wats more....the ppl i interact wif....isnt as happi as they r interacting wif others...n i can sense tt...mayb its better off on my own aft all...

finally....realised i dun realli hav 'frens' ard....all (shld i sae most...) of the ppl i no r.....superficial.... its jus a greeting n nv talked any further....when i realli wanna do tt....jus dunno hw to continue...whether u agree or nt....its up to u to decide....im jus saying my tots....

to all those ppl tt i no who r reading tis blog ( which i guess isnt much ppl...)...i cant realli change ur tots on hw u tink....cos honestly nw...i dun realli care....but tis is hw i feel....whether u like it or nt....i no i can b a better man den i am nw....but 4 mi to do tt....i nd all of ur approvals of mi....of who i am....n nt judge mi by my character....cos it is wat i cant change....

guess 4 nw....i onli hav 1 'real' true fren tt i can rely on....MUSIC.....

e-LeaRnIng....

2006-11-05T19:51:00.000+08:00

went out wif sis today...went new york new york 1st....nt bad...the food is nice....den went to town cos sis wanna buy slippers....den @ heeren saw mark n kelly....haha so qiao....den went to ngee ann....b4 i went home....

well @ least tts all 4 my boring sunday...tml e-learning...sianz...dun feel like studying leh....

coincidence or fate? u decide....

REALLI uSelEsS.....

2006-11-02T19:05:00.000+08:00

haiz...today is horrid....late for practical....woke up late...9 o clock lesson den 845 woke up....rush like mad....sianz....shldnt hav taken tt stupid taxi....cost me $17 sia....wtf....swear i'll nv take taxi again....cost me whole loads of bombs....den arrived @ 920....of course....nt onli tio meh by tchr...but oso cost the whole team the practical.....punctuality mark reduced by half all cos of mi...tts rite...MI!!....felt so bad 4 the whole day...nv realli tot of the practical or the lessons....my mind kp drifting to the report....hw much pts i hav cost them due to my....laziness....

tis whole thing makes mi feel so....traumatised...jus kp blaming myself....dunno y....feeling extremely tired these days....wanted to slp....but kp oversleeping....hw ironic....the 1st song tt i hear aft tt incident is....'bad day'....lol...thanx gerard...urs words r dam true....

nw....mayb i can officially sae tt...i AM useless? haiz....jus wanna throw all these things tt is goin on in my life away....but sumhw cant....everytime i try to b happy....i kp thinking bout the scoresheet....hw i 'helped' the team to cut the score into half thanx to mi....

jus wanna go sumwhere....sumwhere away frm all these....crap....haiz....

uSeLesS.....

2006-10-30T21:21:00.000+08:00

jus a small update....

doin my resume nw.... argh....horrid....jus cant tink of any freaking accomplishments tt i hav.... realli nt in the mindset of tinking anything nw....suppose to go watch 'the guardian' today....but sum of mi frens nt free....hav to wait till e-learning....but den...sum will b bz too during tt wk...haiyo....confusing....

sumtimes i wonder....if im realli tt useless or nt....onli no hw to listen to others instructions n nv realli take a step to ud y i do tis y i do tt....simple task oso cant do well....nt blaming any1....jus blaming myself....bout hw i was born into tis world being so dumb....n my memory....like words on a sand....can b rmbed.....but can b washed or blown away so easily....jus dun hav the storage ability...haiz....

is tis destiny......tt im jus bein....useless? =(

dEaTh NoTe.....

2006-10-24T01:32:00.000+08:00

jus came back frm vivocity....went to watch 'death note'....a bit hesistant @ 1st....den in the end realise nv regret....haha veri nice movie....even tho im sitting @ the front row sides....most of the time seeing the subtitles...haha....but its nice....devil reminds mi of diablo druid shape shift to werewolf haha.....

phew....managed to catch last bus.....if nt...haha....i'll most prob go club or stay @ frens house? haha...cab so ex....midnight surcharge summore....lol....

saw sky park @ vivo today....big area....dam nice...a veri gd place to chill out...haha....n best place 4 mi to b alone @....jus the view n the area of it.....realli veri nice place.....mayb a substitute 4 rooftop esplanade mayb? i dunno....

nt realli in the right mindset to think nw...memory is realli fading mi....simple things i oso cant rmb.....even if its 4 a short moment....haiz....hw am i gonna survive tis way.....

oh btw....where can i get the pic of Ryuku, the God of Death in the movie 'Death Note'? haha....i wan his pic!

off to slp....gt notes to study tml....

sHaGGy...

2006-10-18T14:39:00.000+08:00

woot...nw in sch....so sianz...still gt sum stupid talk later @ 3....n we dche ppl r compulsory....sianz....tink i gonna slp later or wat lor...

anyways....gt my mp3 yest...thanx meng suan...haha...nw i guess tts the onli thing tt can accompany mi thru all these times nw...jus recently feel so shag....everytime....haiz...jus no time to commit a lotta stuffs....

hmmm..nw mental block...realli cant tink much nw...havin prac tml....another day 4 mi too....

will all these ever end? n im still waiting.....

sCapE....sUrF n TuRf.....

2006-10-14T23:38:00.000+08:00

went to meet chun long charlotte n her fren qiqi to escape....lucky i meet them @ a later time...woke up late today....haiz....haha had fun....den aft tt wanted to go sakae to eat...den 4got no buffet...sianz...so wen to eat cavana....wha oso nt cheap....den aft tt they left 4 home....i went to meet joan zhiming waiyew tinwei amos n rueyming to cele joan n rueyming bday....we went surf n turf....wha lao....wanna cry sia the price....but the food is nice anyways....den aft tt went home....tts bout all 4 my days bah...

nw doin my tutorials....sianz....realli no time tml....still gt IC last meeting....den i dun tink will hav time lor...haha....

realli srry 4 the things i did to u....didnt no u will feel tt way....promise wont do it again....

nO MoNeY.....

2006-10-09T22:24:00.000+08:00

haiz.....is the horoscope realli saying the truth? am i realli spending more tis wk? hmmmm....

finish lesson @ 4+.....den meet my sis n her fren winnie to go to vivocity....woot nice place....its as if im in malaysia....realli gt the feel....den went to buy bag....haha....hope my frens like it....den my sis bought clothes.....wha....she realli can shop....den went breeks makan den went home....

wha! spend too much money liao.....no gd....i still gt the wkend to survive.....sat gg out wif clsmates cele joann rueyming bday....sun gg out wif OC to eat....wha....i predicting all my $$ will b gone!....

jus came back home....haiz...so many things to do....i dunno....wkend is the onli time tt i feel...relax....y am i so tensed up all the time? confidence is the thing i lack....n its killing mi.....argh....

oh....4got to mention....my house is so dam messy rite nw!!! all the things all shifted cos they r painting my house....den had to find all my books in 1 stupid box....argh...hope it will end soon...

wats goin on wif my life? cant i hav jus a moment of utopia? jus a moment....?

hAzE.....

2006-10-07T23:55:00.000+08:00

haiz....haze has hit a record high of 150 today....woke up tis morning to c a blanket of fog covering my house skyline....tot i woke up in heaven....lol.....anyways went out today to....ermmm...haha....cannot reveal much....4 nw....

SP had a SP musical yest.....well...according to kelly....its a nice show....haha....i dunno....nv had the time to go....been bz since the start of sch....haiz....

all the reports....studies...tutorials n stress....cumin to mi liao....its happening again....but y am i still feel so slack? or am i compromising other ppl 4 myself? if its tt....den im dam selfish....argh....

gg out wif my siblings tml....long time since i do tt....but oh well...hope it will b an enjoyable 1....haha.....

when shld i give? i dunno....still deciding the right time.....

iNteRaCtiOn cAmP.....

2006-10-01T19:35:00.000+08:00

phew....back frm IC.....wet slope n nite walk....woot....nice....great job to the OC....but haiz....sumhw compromised my work....nw too tired to touch anything relating to studies....if nt i slp....lol....overall the camp is alright.....jus sum prob tt i realli dun wish to mention here..... jus oso i realised kinda miss out on a lotta things....

oh well time to go rest liao....realli haven had much slp till the pt i nearly hallucinate....came back home tt time....tot my parents changed the TV set when they didnt even change in the 1st place....lol....zzzz....

nv do i expect things change so much during tis camp....everything.....u can say....1st time im in rage since dunno when....which i dun realli like.....but i guess i hav no choice....the thing is rite in front of mi.....nw realli had a bad imprint on mi on them....haiz....

sIanZ....1St daY of IC....

2006-09-30T00:50:00.000+08:00

dunno y...jus feel low today....try to b high in front of the campers but jus cant....i oso nv realli get the respect tt i tot i deserved....mayb im tinking too much....but dunno....jus sumhw feel like i realli dun hav a position in the camp even tho im the medic head....but haiz....wat to do? in life....sum ppl like or hate u....jus hav to accept it....

oh well....jus nw handle 1 person.....i oso dunno whether i handled it correctly or nt....haiz....hope i dun get anybody into trouble....i realli dun wan anything to happen....

gtg....wanna slp soon.....

respect.....the 1 thing i hope to get....but jus cant get.....

1St dAy Of wOeNesS.....

2006-09-25T23:48:00.000+08:00

haiz....1st day of sch aft holis....expected....late 4 cls....den the lectures r sooooo.....BORING!....yupz....u heard mi rite....its dam boring....i dun even no hw i can survive 4 12 wks nw...i jus wondering....

basically the day is nth much jus full of actions....shall nt mention it here....nt very convienient...

all i can sae is quite bad....den went out wif zhengye to accompany him to collect his bracelet....den walk ard a while den went home...along the way talk a lot of things....haha @ least tts nt boring...

watched spore idol jus nw.....as expected.....hady won....wat do u no....its the same situation as last season....haiz....cant sporeans wake up n realise wat they r doin? oh well....glad tt tis 1 may b the last season....phew....

stupid internet connection kp causing mi to b kanna killed....wha lao aye....want a change....

its true tt everybody changes....but 4 the better or 4 the worse? i dunno....jus stuck in tis place where a dilemma has to occur....hope u had fun on 1st day cos mine is horrid....

nOn bUdgEt Gl oUtiNg....

2006-09-23T23:19:00.000+08:00

had game trial yest...kinda alrite jus didnt get to slp much cos cant slp....den went back home @ ard 8....suppose to slp veri long....in the end onli slpt 4 2 hrs...sianz....

den went wif my mum dad n my young sis to change phone...haiz dun wanna talk bout it....1 thing i no its tt....i wont b gettin a new phone until like wat....november? wth....waited 4 like 1 n a half yrs liao den nw hav to wait again? argh.....

den evening went wif jiayi evelyn yunzhen peiqi n zhengye to go marina south to had seafood buffet....haha....had fun chatting n talking a lotta stuffs.....aft tt went arcade den went home...

haiz....holis end officially tml....nw hav to go back to sch again....feels kinda....weird u can say....such a short holi....hw ironic....tts nt wat i sae bout a few wks ago....which makes mi wonder....wat is it tt u realli wan in life.....till nw i dun hav an ans....

hw weird tt during the game trial i can behave in a way tt u r....invisible....

cABle sKi n BoWl.....

2006-09-21T21:36:00.000+08:00

met yu cheng paul chern xin n his fren j to go to the cable ski....woot....it was fun....tho i fell into the water a lotta times b4 i get the trick....n managed to stay on the ski....haha....but wakeboarding is hard....gt off the platform a few metres den poof....haha...

oh suddenly rmb....my fren i was bside him....den when he is ready to go....he flew....but the board is still there at the dock....haha...im like tinking....ermmm....where the hell is he? lol....

oh ya....met sum rjc acquaintances at the ski park....haha...veri de frenly....they were all the same cls who cum to play aft their prelims....wha dam pro sia they all....

aft tt went to bowl....woot....gt my highest record ever.....165! haha...so happy....but den the 2nd rd....ermmm....

den acty wanted to went home....yu cheng sae go tm n century sq....so i go lor....jus walked ard....den saw pasar malam....tried the smelly beancurd....weird....near the area....stinks....aft u try it....it taste like normal fried beancurd....den realli....the smell is gone....haha....aft tt eat ice cream den went home...

haha....had fun today....i hope u had fun today too....or shld i sae....everyday....=)

pOly 50 cElEbRaTiOn ChAlEt.....

2006-09-15T12:14:00.000+08:00

back frm poly50 celebration chalet....well b4 tt in the morn went 4 IC OC meeting....haha...best ppl tt i worked wif....they r jus so funny la....woot....den jus so happen saw ICE camp....its their last day....haha we oso go ji xiao them once....woot....aft tt went to chalet....haha....saw sum ppl tt i haven seen in sch 4 a long time liao...sure had fun wif them....@ nite play mahjong chit chat all those....till bout 3 den zzz....

today woke up @ ard 9.....den went to eat breakfast den went home...

holis ending soon....dunno whether its a gd or bad thing....haiz....mus make full use of my last wk man.....

haiz...c u so tired is so ermmm....i dunno hw to say....but i hope u do tc of urself....

Y nO A....y No 3?...

2006-09-13T18:42:00.000+08:00

jus checked my result jus nw....well it was alrite....2.92 sem overall 2.866.....haiz....jus cant get a 3 isnt it.....n the worst thing....NO As!!!!! the onli A i hav was frm a stupid module....char dev.....wth....o well.....work hard.....but hw hard to get my goal? is my effort realli nt enough? or isit destiny? my sec sch oso the same....no A1 onli A2.....nw cum poly....no A onli B+.....wat mus i do sia....tinking bout it....shld i even b in or nt.....feel like bowing out of it....but dunno hw to sae....

*sigh*....hope u do well....dun b a loser like mi man.....

wAt dO i BlOg 4?

2006-09-08T19:32:00.000+08:00

haiz....recently felt so sick ever since tue nite....dunno y....even walkin up the stairs oso like so difficult like tt....my whole body jus feel so weak....headache almost every nw n den....den oso veri lethargic....oh well...try to tink wat i did 4 the past wk....

wed....went to sum bbq @ east coast park organised by sports n welfare comm.....sianz....the pit is like dam far away la....overall the bbq is ok la...nth much of a hype or sumthing....jus a way to relax myself....or try to....cos the whole time im lying down shivering....haiz...

thur....1st IC game trial....it was alrite la....nt much of a prob 4 mi....jus feel tt running tt time veri tiring even tho its short dist....den @ nite fall sick again....tis time i felt veri weak...took a medicine n went to slp....

fri...woke up felt slightly better....went to LAN shop play games....but nw back home...felt so weak again....wats wrong wif mi?

oh well....i've been tinking....y do i even tag in the 1st place? is it jus to kp those memories? or show to others bout ur exp in life? if its the latter...den i feel i shldnt blog @ all....look....i guess tt no 1 is acty reading my blog....y do they even bother rite? sumtimes i realli wonder....who ur true frens r....who will realli b there 4 u when ur down? who u can call upon in the middle of the nite jus 4 him or her to accompany u? i guess i haven met any1 who is....apparently due to bz-ness i guess....

they sae love cums when least expected....but hw am i gonna expect the unexpected when i kp tinking bout her? i c everybody ard mi....or bein blessed....but y nt mi? they sae kp waiting....but hw long? 50 yrs? by den i wld hav....argh....dun wanna tink bout it....i jus cant wait....time is my enemy....if u can rmb.....

aIrShOw...CoMeX....hAnG oUt.....

2006-09-03T01:27:00.000+08:00

woot....went 4 the RSAF open house today....veri nice....1st time went 4 an air show.....dam nice....better view den frm my house....haha....like the part when the F-16 is bout to take off n saw the whole flame behind the jet....woot so cool....still gt others....haiz too lazy to say everything.....mus go today n c 4 urself....

den @ nite went to comex @ expo....acty nt much interest in mi there....cos nt buyin anythin...went to find alex....haha explain until so detailed....lol....

den went bedok wif my fren to wait 4 my another fren....cos he driving.....den realised his car on rent....so cant realli drive too far....sianz...but nvm....went to eat prata....woot....when we gt the bill....weird....onli $3 when we bought 2 plain 2 cheese 1 egg teh bing teh n ice lemon tea....den when we left tt time....realised....we onli pay 4 the drinks....haha....we eat 4 free....woot.....den went to east coast....hang out n drink coffee....aft tt he send mi home....

gg out wif seow hong tml....long time nv c him liao....cant wait to tell him everything bout my life...woot....

hmmm....tinking whether i shld buy tt or nt....n tinking when to meet her....mayb wed bahs....in the meantime....missin u....

bAck To SeC sCh....

2006-08-31T20:08:00.000+08:00

lets c....nv update 4 quite sum time...hmmm.....recallin wat i did 4 the past wk....

mon....went to watch 'click' oooh.....nice show....den jus hang out or sumthin....realli was kinda down aft the movie....dunno y...haiz.....went to talk wif joan....thanx girl....den we waited 4 june to knock off frm work den chit chat again....den send june home...@ tt time jus dun wanna go home...dunno y....

tue nth much jus slack @ home....

wed....went back sch to check on medic kits....den went wif sum ppl to siew ling's mum funeral...onli realised it on tt day....haiz....den went home...realised com spoil....sianz....

thur....today...went back to sec sch....woot wasnt tt bad as i expected it to b....jus tt i tink fewer students r cumin back.....tts understandable...As cumin....more tchrs r retirin....dunno y....but overall kinda feels gd to go back to sec sch....
den went to parkway to play pool....aft tt go eat n went home....

jus came back....den realised my com is backed up again....lol sort sort 1.....haha back to my games liao....

joan ah....y didnt u tell mi bout tt incident @ squash....nw den i realised u r tryin ur best to put a smile to the others when u r onli givin an excuse tt u hav muscle pain? i shld hav known its more den tt....haiyo....hope u will b more relax on sat ok?

n girl...hope to c u soon....kinda miss u nw u no....haha....

oVeR!!!!!!!!!!! fInAlLy.....

2006-08-24T18:13:00.000+08:00

woot....aft dunno hw many wks of study n 2 wks of exams.....its finally over.....O-V-E-R!!!!! phew finally can take a break man....went out wif sum of my clsmates aft the paper....chiong arcade play all those games....woot....nv felt so relieved in my life....haha....

nw back to play diablo 2 haha....so sianz....wanted to go out even more....but oh well....i still hav a month left....haha....oh well....back to my games liao...haha....

tinking of u all the time....

y Is It hApPeNiNg tO mI?

2006-08-19T21:47:00.000+08:00

haiz....went to study wif waiyew joan wilfred june zhiming @ airport again...supposedly a normal day 4 mi....but cos of 1 stupid incident....which i 4gave but jus cant 4get....tt made mi so...ermmm...nt myself....shall nt mention wat isit....but all i know its pure stupidity....sumthing tt u wld jus 4get....but i took it so seriously....i guess they knew wats goin on....but i jus couldnt put myself to b who i am @ tt time...haiz....nw dunno whether wan to folo them to go study tml or nt....i jus dun wan the same thing to happen again....

guys....i no hw i treat u all today is nt suppose to b tt way....i jus cant put myself to do wat im suppose to do....which is to take it as it is....jus cant....dunno y......my mind dun allow mi to....mayb cos wat happen during sec sch days jus haunt back to mi...so i jus wanna apologise to those i gave a cold shoulder to...to joan....jus wan u to no i dun blame u 4 nt tellin ur ermm....secret...so to speak....n im sry bout today....i guess u can feel it....jus nt sayin onli......n to u 'girl'....thanx 4 ur encouragement...realli felt u were there 4 mi when im @ the viewing mall....alone....i guess u r the onli 1 i can realli talk to nw....

sTudYinG....4 ThE 1St TiMe.....

2006-08-12T22:37:00.000+08:00

friday...

studied wif joan wilfred zhiming june waiyew arens @ changi airport.....realli nice place to study..but c so many jc ppl....a bit...hmmm....haha....anyways....promised to go watch fireworks 1....but haiz....they all wanted to continue to study so bo bian....sacrifice....literally....cos the whole fireworks showcase nv watch @ all...argh....i hope its worth it....den went tm to eat den go home....

today....

went to zhiming's house to study....haha kinda alright.....but i cant believe i used the whole day to study on onli 1 chapter...sianz....nt much time left to catch up....lav test on mon...den nxt day chem react....sia la....si bei low....haiz....wat to do?

tml....

will b goin to joan's house to study.....hmmm....hope can catch up....if nt.....die!!!

i kp tellin myself nt to tink bout it....but does it kp surfacing in my mind? haiz....realli hard to 4get it 4 tis period of time....time kp playin a fool on mi....i always tot today is sunday....y? n my memory is realli fading mi....kp 4getting stuffs...jus 2 more wks to freedom....n meeting her....@ least i hope so.....

hAPPy NaTiOnAl daY!!!

2006-08-09T22:09:00.000+08:00

woot....happy national day singapore....jus nw went to geylang to watch the fireworks wif my dad n mum....on my way there when im waiting 4 the bus....these 3 f-16 fighter jets zoom past our head....sia la....can c the flame behind the jet n the noise is rumbling n deafening....haha....den went to c the fireworks....woot...it was nice....close den i tot...den we decided to walk back home...sia la....very crowded....surprisingly nt much of those ermmm 'chickens' but more of arens favourites....if u no wat i mean....haha....n i mean a lot.....den went to buy beancurd n wanted to top up my card @ the stn....but sianz...kanna cordoned off...so cant go in....so went home...

plant design test tml...last of the ica modules b4 the real exams which starts on monday....haha tis wk gonna b interesting....studying @ 3 different places....fri airport....sat zhiming house....sun joan house...shall nt fail....mus pass....it will all b over in 15 days....

everybody changes.....

NVM '08

aShAmeD...

*SRRR n F n H*

*mY lIFe IS SCreWeD!!!!!!!!!!!!*

*dAy ToUr*

*rElAxEd....*

*CPTC n FO*

*tHE tIme HAS cUm!....*

*eMotIonS gT E BetTeR oF me...*

*iTP @ jUroNg IsLanD....*

*tHe GuiLtY wIlL SuFfeR.....*

*hApPy LNY!!!!!*

*i WanDer AlOne....*

*eXaM OveR FinAllY!!!*

*eXam Is CumIn....*

*1sT dAy oF 2007!!!*

*mERRy ChRiStMaS!!!*

*mOs....*

*aD n D 2006*

*lAst DAY!!!!*

*fReE....4 nW....*

*oUt oF oPtIon....oUt of tImE....^

*1sT tiMe aFt 4 yRs....*

*aLonE nW.....*

*toO mAny WOrK....*

*viVo....*

*gEtTiNg tO No mYsElf BeTTer.....*

*fReNs....iS it ReaLli iT? or.....*

*e-LeaRnIng....*

*REALLI uSelEsS.....*

*uSeLesS.....*

*dEaTh NoTe.....*

*sHaGGy...*

*sCapE....sUrF n TuRf.....*

*nO MoNeY.....*

*hAzE.....*

*iNteRaCtiOn cAmP.....*

*sIanZ....1St daY of IC....*

*1St dAy Of wOeNesS.....*

*nOn bUdgEt Gl oUtiNg....*

*cABle sKi n BoWl.....*

*pOly 50 cElEbRaTiOn ChAlEt.....*

*Y nO A....y No 3?...*

*wAt dO i BlOg 4?*

*aIrShOw...CoMeX....hAnG oUt.....*

*bAck To SeC sCh....*

*oVeR!!!!!!!!!!! fInAlLy.....*

*y Is It hApPeNiNg tO mI?*

*sTudYinG....4 ThE 1St TiMe.....*

*hAPPy NaTiOnAl daY!!!*